HIS DIVINE DEPARTURE

When we arrived in those final hours on November 14th he was not speaking. I felt at that time by seeing his face that he was fully remembering the pastimes of Krsna in Vrndavana. I think it was great mercy coming from Krsna because for his whole lifetime he had served Radha-Krsna. For that special person, Krsna absorption is there. Entranced in this way, his eyes were closed and he was exhibiting special symptoms. It was a very touching (karuna) scene. He had no pain, no distraction. At that time his mouth was so beautiful-- like a blossomed rose, like a lotus.

These are the signs of a very great personality. Otherwise another may cry, "I am dying, I am dying" and the face will be so ugly. But he was never like that. He was like a beautiful lotus flower. So I knew what he was doing. I have seen others also, including my Gurudeva, Srila Bhaktiprajnana Kesava Gosvami Maharaja, going to aprakana-lila (entering Krsna's eternal pastimes at the time of leaving the body). I have seen Ananga-mohana Brahmacari, Jagannatha Babaji Maharaja (disciple of Srila Bhaktisiddhanta Prabhupada), Narasimha Maharaja and Padmanabha Maharaja. I have seen many when they departed so I could judge at that time how it was going on. They would say, 'Krsna Krsna ... Radhe Radhe'. There are signs, particular signs at that moment which show someone is remembering Krsna, and Swami Maharaja was exhibiting all those signs. He was very beautiful, very high-class. There was no sign of pain, and no attachment to the body or anything else. He was no longer anxious for his young disciples nor for any of the outward things he had established in his Krsna consciousness movement. Now there was nothing else; only remembering Krsna.

Our brahmacaris were softly singing some bhajanas. At that time I saw that he was fully satisfied, and thus I was also fully satisfied. I knew then that he would surely go soon, but there was no sign when he would go; he would leave now or in a short time. Before, he had talked with me when he was in his external senses, but he did not request me to stay. I was not in a hurry, but I was thinking that just after my leaving for Mathura he would enter into nitya-lila. We left to return to Mathura and then we were informed that he departed a few hours later.

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Shortly after that time we returned to the Krsna-Balarama Mandir and made all arrangements for his mahotsava. According to his wishes we took him on procession in front of most of the important deities of Vrndavana. There were so many of his disciples and other persons chanting in that procession. All of the Vraja-vasis came into the streets to honor him. After this, I prepared his body. I wrote the special mantras on his chest and forehead with tilaka. I used the salt for his body. Then, following all of the proper Vaisnava procedures, I put his transcendental body into samadhi with my own hand.